So, I go to pick up my turkey yesterday at the neighborhood macelleria:

Macellaio: That’ll be 60 euro.

Me: Seems like a lot – the guy I ordered from said it would be around 30…

Macellaio: 30 euro, for a 35-pound turkey??

Me: 35 pounds?? I asked for a 10 to 12-pound turkey!

Macellaio: Ooooh, wait a second – you ordered the female turkey… You must be the OTHER American!

Yay for being one of two in town… with a smaller oven, apparently. Happy Thanksgiving!

Italy for 30 years had war, terror, and murder under the Borgias, but in that time produced Michelangelo, Leonardo da Vinci and the Renaissance; Switzerland had 500 years of peace and democracy—and produced the cuckoo clock.

Orson Welles –

Passing couple on the sidewalk:

Husband says: ‘Amore, vuoi una goccia d’acqua?’ (Honey, do you want a sip of water?)

And the wife (totally seriously) replies: ‘Ma noooo – ho ancora il sapore del gelato in bocca!’ (No way – I still have the taste of gelato in my mouth!)

Yep, it’s that good.

Julius Caeser often felt inadequate. At times, he would compare himself to Alexander the Great who died at the age of 33. Caeser didn’t become a Roman Consul until he was 40. He crossed the Rubicon and eventually become emperor, but not until he was 51. The lesson? Do not trap yourself in comparisons to others, make your own path, and never get involved in Italian politics.

Unknown internet commenter.